Hibernation and The Offseason Practice
I, Cicero, pause at the edge of the forest. One paw still on frozen ground. One eye on the city. He turns back one last time, not with rage, but with instruction. Also, I’m dragging this cooler of ice-cold beer with me back to my den.
The Last Exhale
The loss to the Rams hurts because it was right there. Not a collapse. Not a farce. Not a mercy-killing. It was a real playoff game, played by a real team, decided by inches, timing, and the cruel route running miscommunication of DJ Moore.
And yet, when the clock hit zero, something unprecedented happened. The crowd stood. Not polite applause. Not ironic clapping. A standing ovation for a Bears team that lost.
Cicero felt it in his bones. The same bones that have known decades of bitterness. This was different. For years, Bears fandom has been an endurance sport. Long losing streaks. National embarrassment. Games that felt over by the second quarter. Sundays that drained joy instead of delivering it.
The 2025 Bears were none of that. Turnovers and 4th quarter comebacks. Miracle, clutch throws with the game on the line. Summons Gladiator voice: ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? Yes, Maximus Decimus Meridius, we were most definitely entertained.
Cicero’s Guide to Physical and Mental Survival
A Bears season does not end when the clock hits zero. It simply changes form. The forest teaches this. Nothing disappears. It rests, rebuilds, and returns louder. Here is how Bears fans survive the long months ahead without losing their minds, their health, or their remaining goodwill toward humanity.
1. MOVE YOUR BODY LIKE A CHICAGOAN, NOT A MONK
You do not need a vision board. You need circulation. Walk the lakefront in bad weather. Shovel snow like it owes you money. Take the stairs at work while muttering about offensive line continuity. Physical movement clears frustration faster than discourse ever will.
Cicero recommends:
Long walks with podcasts you half-listen to
Lifting something heavy while imagining it is a Packers fan’s opinion
Stretching because you are no longer twenty and denial is not flexibility
Motion quiets the noise.
2. EAT WITH INTENT, NOT GUILT
This is not the time for extremes. You may eat salads. You may eat Gene and Jude’s hot dogs. Crush some cans of Old Style. All can exist in the same week.
The Bears taught us balance this season. Score fast when you can. Grind when you must.
Hydrate. Eat vegetables occasionally. Do not apologize for enjoying food that tastes like joy.
Cicero survives winter by storing energy, not by shaming himself for needing it.
3. LIMIT YOUR EXPOSURE TO OFFSEASON TAKE CULTURE
This is critical. Mute accounts. Close tabs. Stop reading mock drafts written by people who think vibes are a measurable stat. Your nervous system does not need daily arguments about defensive tackle rankings in March.
Set boundaries:
One draft rabbit hole per week
No engaging with Packers fans until at least July
Walk away from any sentence that starts with “advanced metrics say Bears fans should be miserable”
Silence is a performance enhancer.
4. PRACTICE GRATITUDE WITHOUT LOWERING EXPECTATIONS
This is advanced Bears fandom. Be grateful the team is relevant again. Be grateful games matter. Be grateful that hope returned without apology.
And still demand more. Gratitude is not complacency. It is energy conservation for future rage.
Cicero bows to the season for what it gave, not for what it promised.
5. REST LIKE IT IS PART OF THE PLAN
Sleep is not weakness. Rest is not quitting. Turn off notifications. Watch something that has nothing to do with football. Let Sundays become peaceful again for a while.
Even the fiercest creatures hibernate. Especially them.
FINAL WORD FROM THE FOREST
The Bears will be back. You will be back. The city will buzz again.
Until then, take care of the body that carries your fandom. Protect the mind that survived decades of nonsense. Store strength quietly.
Cicero knows seasons end. The forest teaches impermanence. Even the river freezes, then returns.
Cicero disappears into the trees. Spring always comes back.
